regrets?
sometimes i wonder why ppl choose to get into relationships, why they want so badly to be in a relationship when it's guaranteed to bring tears and heartache? (btw i'm guilty of this also) i mean i know my quote says that it's better to have LOVED and LOST than NEVER to have loved at all, but isn't once enuff? why get broken hearted twice?as you all know i was in a 2 year relationship a fews years ago and it ended rather sour. it took me a long time to get over this and i was definetly broken hearted, some of you saw me at school, i was practically a zombie. (btw they only reason i can talk about this now is because i've gotten over it and moved on, i never thought it possible but it feels great to be free of that hinderance!) i vowed that i would never get that involved or that serious in a relationship again, that i would never submit myself to guy and let him have control of my life, and my emotions ever again. and i succeeded at this for nearly 2 years. my entire first year of uni was me loving and enjoying being single, it was great, no one holding me back from doing what i loved and absoutely no one breaking MY heart! (altho i'm not sure i can say the same for myself hehe j/k!)
but i've gone and done it again....i've gotten involved, but how can i be certain that this won't be the same? but i suppose that's the BIG question everyone who may be in a similar situation struggles with also, how can one be sure that this ONE is worth it; worth all the heartache, all the tears, the sorrows and the pain that comes with the territory? you feel so confident and sure in the beginning, but as time goes on you question it more and more....i know every relationship has its hard times, their down times, i guess it's all about pushing thru and you decide on your own what's worth it.
i suppose i'm just struggling right now being on the otherside of the country and thousands of miles away. it's hard...sometimes i want to give up trying, to go back to my single life...but as i tell everyone else, you have to give it your all so that in the end you yourself have no regrets, no doubts about whether you didn't try hard enuff, and that's exactly what i'll do...i'll put in the effort the time, even the tears, and even if he doesn't, in the end i'll know and i'll be satisfied.
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